where is my voice as a free person; where is my home

I agree to some extent,
there are days I work in a disgusting manner, only creating more work for others,
And days I influence the young not to work better.
There are days I disregard my duties,
And give my jobs to the younger one,
And days I use my tongue not for taste but to run my mouth.
There are days I shamelessly bring in my report card with B's along with the A's,
and days I dress up a little more than others.
There are days when finding my bag is like moving in a maze,
And days when I fight with the young in a bloody craze.

But if I am answerable to you then why don't you hear me out,
for the deeds that I have done why don't you ever cease to shout?
Where is my voice as a person not suppressed,
where is the equal treatment against breaking rules for the rest?

How can I tell you?
I feel as shameful as you feel angry at me for not being responsible,
And I feel sad as well.
It is so hard for you to realise that I can be sad too, so you never consider the possibility at all?
Where are you when I stumble and fall?

This is not to explain myself but to show you,
Out of what of think of me, what all is true

I love you so much papa

Today I lost a piece of my soul, 
And it is irreparable. 
Bereft of your pain, I am happy for you
But now I don't have my best friend anymore. 
You were the one who not only leaded me, 
but also held my hand and walked beside me. 
You were a person who's love was like a giant tree, 
in the midst of a dreary, damp forest; 
A little love blowed to thee 
could fire up your metabolism and then, 
You spread love and laughter as proliferating as a tornado. 
You are my best friend, 
and I know I was yours,
we shared a connection that was beautiful and lovely and wonderful and, real. 
I talk to you from my heart and, 
they are anything but missed calls. 
You never missed a message from me, 
And I hope you always call me. 
That evening you told me it was okay to cry, 
But important to be the strong pillar
of a naive mother. 
I miss you already because you were the one who could tap the inner me, 
and instil that drive, that motivation
And I feel alone because I have lose my best friend.