I hate that you are on my mind these days. I have tried my hardest all this time to forget you, and it has worked, but I can't forget our stories, can I? How do I forget the memories? Heck, I even remember the way I used to feel.
Every time I scroll through my Instagram feed, I see your 'like' on many of the posts, heck, why do we follow the same celebrities?
Why have you been running through my mind? I don't know. While I'm one to enjoy a reminiscence of the past in any manner, these memories, in particular, I like to steer clear from. It reminds me of how I cannot stop myself trying to fix the broken, to heal the sick, to protect the weak. There is only momentary happiness in that, and then I am the one that is rendered broken, sick, and weak.
Truth be told, it is not the person that I miss but the idea of the person I had built in mind. I made myself believe that this person is one that I would save, (but that is a decision one should not make), and the one I would have a happily ever after with, and so, now, all this time later, I still wonder if I am running through this person's mind just as much as they are running through mine.
I guess some things are better left unanswered. I fear the answer might upset me, so I would rather make up an answer for myself only for me to know. Ignorance is bliss. Actually, who am I kidding? I know the answer to that. No one is a fool like me; everyone knows how to let go.
Now I see why I tend to wall up around people. I truly cannot afford to put my heart's worth of efforts out there, only to bleed to death again.
Signing off.
Yours, insane with riddles from the past, the future, the present, the limbo, everywhere,
Nalini