I know not a thing, and you don't either

The music hurts my ears, but the silence does more. 

The chaos just eats away at my peace. 

If my shut my eyes, I think the sky outside is red,

but when I open them, I still don't have any sight. 

Waking up feels like a chore, so does falling asleep;

I exhale a tear but I wish it was a snore. 

 

The wind scars my skin, but their words do more. 

I'm not one to commit, because I am the sin.

Because a person is the sum of what they do, 

and I have just transgressed. 

The worst of me said may be true, but so is the good. 

 

I know not when I will find the warmth I so desire. 

I know not when I will find a version of myself

I am happy to be. 

So I wish I could. 

 

Till then, I am the stone while I am the bird, 

I am sensible yet I am the absurd.

gulp

She sits and I stare, 

my headphones don't cancel noise

and she knows, so she says

"You're useless, a disgrace, a black spot in my life,"

I blink, consider rolling my eyes, why would I not?

I am the bad guy, the rampant teen. 

"Your heart is selfish at its core, you hurt others, 

hell, you can only use others for your own benefit,

if it were up to you, you'd use your own brother, 

so here's the truth and hear it clearly - you're shit."

I blink again, so nonchalant. 

There is a brief silence. I say "Well, go on. Isn't there more?"

"O Lord, if you hear me, never let anyone have anybody like her

in their lives, no matter what the have done."

She turns to me and says,

"Yes, you're nothing but a curse

to anyone whose life you're in,

you're in my life only because

in my past life, I must have committed a hundred sins."

I blink. Make my eyes devoid and look right at hers, 

which brim with hatred and disgust. 

As she looks away, I silently gulp,

and push down the block in my throat.